IMDb > Pain (Character) > Quotes
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Pain (Character)
from Hercules (1997)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
ALERT: All Character pages will be turned off on Dec 6th 2017.
Please see the IMDb GetSatisfaction Character announcement for details.

Hercules (1997)
Panic: He's not gonna be happy when he gets outta there.
Pain: You mean, IF he gets outta there.
Panic: If... If is good.

Panic: "Hercules." Why does that name ring a bell?
Pain: I don't know. Um, maybe we owe him money?
Panic: Wait, wasn't Hercules the name of that kid we were supposed to...?
Panic, Pain: Oh, my Gods!
Pain: Run for it!
[Hades seizes them and chokes them]
Hades: So you took care of him, huh? "Dead as a doornail." Weren't those your exact words?
Pain: This might be a different Hercules!
Panic: Yeah. I mean, Hercules is a very popular name nowadays.
Pain: Remember like a few years ago, every other boy was named Jason and the girls were all named Britney?
Hades: I'm about to rearrange the cosmos... and the one schlemiel who can louse it up... is waltzing around IN THE WOODS!

Hades: Pain!
Pain: Coming, your most lugubriousness.
Hades: Panic!
Panic: Oh, sorry. I can handle it.
[Runs down the stairs; trips and crashes into Pain; they tumble down the stairs; Pain is now stuck to Panic's horns]
Pain: Pain - Ow!
Panic: And Panic - eechk!
Pain, Panic: ...reporting for duty!
Hades: Fine, fine, fine. Just inform me the minute the Fates arrive.
Panic: Oh, they're here!
Hades: [shouting] WHAT? The Fates were here and you didn't tell me?
Pain, Panic: [grovel] We are worms!
[as they grovel, they turn into worms]
Pain, Panic: Worthless worms!
Hades: Memo to me, Memo to me: Maim you after my meeting.

[after Pain and Panic, disguised as children, are rescued by Hercules]
Hades: Stirring performance, boys. I was really moved.
Panic: "Jeepers, Mister"?
Pain: I was going for innocence.

Hades: I can't believe this guy! I throw everything I've got at him, and it doesn't even...
[Hades notices Pain is wearing Air-Hercs]
Hades: What... are... those?
Pain: Um, I don't know. I-I thought they looked kinda dashing...
Hades: [slowly burns up] I've got 24 hours to get rid of this... bozo, or the entire scheme I've been setting up for 18 years goes up in smoke, and YOU ARE WEARING HIS MERCHANDISE?
[Hades hears a noise, and sees Panic slurping some "Herculade"]
Panic: [chuckles nervously] Thirsty?
[Hades screams, and blows up a volcano]

Pain, Panic: [disguised as kids trapped in a rockslide] Somebody call IX-I-I.

[Meg encounters a rabbit and a gopher in the woods]
Meg: Aw, how cute. A couple of rodents lookin' for a theme park.
Pain: [as rabbit] Who are you callin' a rodent, sister? I'm a bunny.
Panic: [as chipmunk] A-And I'm his gopher.

Hades: Pain. Panic. Got a little riddle for ya. How do you kill a god?
Pain: [sounds assertive at first] I do not... know.
Panic: You can't... they're immortal?
Hades: Bingo, they're immortal. So the first thing we gotta do is make the little sunspot... mortal.

Panic: [after catching the eye the Fates use to see] OH, Gross!
Pain: It blinked!

Pain: [as he and Panic patrol the now-imprisoned gods, bellowing] Hup-two-three-four, c'mon, everybody. I can't *hear* you!

Pain: [beaten up by Pegasus] My intentions were pure! I really was attracted to you!

"Hercules: Hercules and the Prom (#1.40)" (1998)
[Reading Helle magazine]
Pain: Orpheus' likes: fun people.
Panic: Orpheus' pet peeves: unfun people.