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Quotes for
The Flash (Character)
from "The Flash" (2014)

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"Justice League: The Brave and the Bold (#1.12)" (2002)
Solivar: Get your stinking paws off me, you filthy human!
The Flash: Say what?

[Flash is regaling two ladies in a diner - or trying to, while wolfing down burgers and sodas]
The Flash: But he never had a chance. Because I'm...
Blonde Girl: [bored] The fastest man alive.
Dark-Haired Girl: Yeah, you told us.

Detective: How do you take your coffee?
The Flash: With cream and 37 sugars.
[pause]
The Flash: What? I'm not kidding!

The Flash: Look, if I wanted the third degree, I could have stayed in there. Like I told 'em, I don't remember.
Green Lantern: All right, then let's start with the last thing you *do* remember.
The Flash: Let's see, after I caught the gorilla, he told me that...
Green Lantern: The gorilla *talked* to you?
The Flash: Yeah, right after I stopped his car.
Green Lantern: I'm supposed to believe this?
The Flash: Hey, we both got a Martian's phone number on our speed dial. I think I deserve the benefit of the doubt here.
Green Lantern: Let's check it out, *together* this time.

The Flash: OK, pull over.
[the truck swerves to the side toward him]
The Flash: Hey!

The Flash: Can I help if I have a hyper-accelerated metabolism? Besides, it's just a little snack.
[holes up ten hot dogs]

The Flash: [of the driving gorilla] Now there's something you don't see every day.

The Flash: Easy, boy. We'll have you back behind monkey bars before you know it.

The Flash: [of the Flash] If he were *really* guilty, you think you could've held him here with a pair of handcuffs?

Dr. Sarah Corwin: [he disappears from where she was aiming the gun at him to behind her] How - ?
The Flash: You blinked.

Solivar: [Green Lantern finds gorilla footprints in the park with his ring and follows them to Solivar in a small tunnel, who beats his chest and roars and runs right for him and The Flash, then Green Lantern fires a beam at his chest, knocking him backwards out of the tunnel and onto his back] Was that really necessary?
Green Lantern: Okay, so he can talk. Who are you?
Solivar: My name is Solivar. I'm chief of security for Gorilla City.
The Flash: Gorilla City? You've gotta be kidding.
Solivar: I can assure you this is no laughing matter.
Green Lantern: Go on.
Solivar: Safely hidden from humanity...
[the scene transitions to a flashback]
Solivar: We apes have lived in peace for thousands of years. Until the black day when a power mad genius known as Grodd tried to conquer our city with advanced mind-control technology. We were able to thwart his evil plot, but we could not prevent his escape.
[the scene transitions back to now]
Solivar: It wasn't until later that we discovered he had also stolen our city's security plans. Grodd has sworn terrible revenge against all those who reside in Gorilla City.


"Justice League: Flash and Substance (#5.5)" (2006)
[after questioning the Trickster about the other villains' whereabouts]
Orion: What about your enemy?
The Flash: Oh, right.
[to the Trickster]
The Flash: Dude, as soon as you finish your drink, turn yourself in.
The Trickster: [raising his mug] Got me again, Flash!

[Flash is trying to outrun Mirror Master. Mirror Master is shooting small mirrors everywhere]
The Flash: You are so cleaning this place up.
Mirror Master: Make me! Or rather... Find me!
[Flash sees dozens of "Mirror Masters" in front of him. Only one is the real Mirror Master]
The Flash: [charging and swinging at each one] Nope... Nope... Nope...
[he finally hits the real Mirror Master]
The Flash: There you are!

[the Flash is dropping hopeful hints about the Flash Museum's opening ceremony in Central City]
The Flash: It'd be great if one of the original seven was there. I mean, I understand if everybody's too busy to come, no biggie. My mom's gonna be there... let's see, my uncle's flying in... I know, it's the "Flash" museum, but to me the whole League deserves the honor. Like I said, no biggie.
[Silence. Flash droops and lets out a sigh]
Batman: [resignedly] What time?
The Flash: Six o'clock... No! You're really coming? Awesome! You're a stand-up guy, Bats! Don't ever let anyone call you a crazed loner.

[last lines]
The Flash: Hey, the bad guys went down, and nobody got hurt. You know what I call that? A really good day.

Orion: You're tied to a very large boomerang.
The Flash: [sarcastic] Yeah?

The Flash: Here's the deal: you tell me where those guys went, and I promise to come visit you in the hospital. We'll play darts! The soft kind.
The Trickster: Okay. They're going to ambush you at the Flash Museum.
The Flash: See? That's all we needed.

The Flash: James, you're off your meds, aren't you?
The Trickster: I'm better off without them. Take 'em if I start feeling down.
The Flash: You know that's not how the medicine works. You're not well.
The Trickster: I'm fine! You want to throw some darts?
The Flash: No. Listen, James, you're wearing the suit again.
The Trickster: I am?
[looks at himself]
The Trickster: Well, what do you know?

[a hologram appears]
The Flash: Mirror Master!
Mirror Master: You're quick as ever.
The Flash: Yeah? Well, you're... you're not really all there!
Mirror Master: Oh, nice try. If you'd had another minute, you might have thought of a decent comeback.

[after dismantling Mirror Master's trap]
The Flash: While you're waiting for me to come arrest you, why not take this time and reflect on your mistakes?
[turns to leave]
The Flash: [chuckles] Hey, that was pretty good.

[trapped by a giant boomerang]
The Flash: I swear, when I get out of this I'm gonna find you and hurl all over you!
Captain Boomerang: Touch of dizziness? You might find it useful to focus on one point on the horizon. For instance, that mountain you're set to crash into.

[trapped in Mirror Master's "Disco of Death"]
Mirror Master: I was never fond of you, Flash. But I'm a reasonable man. If you'd just looked the other way once in a while, we could have co-existed in peace. Instead, you never let up. So you've gotta go.
The Flash: That music is what's gotta go!


"Justice League: Secret Origins: Part II (#1.2)" (2001)
The Flash: Where have you been all my life?
Wonder Woman: Themyscira.
The Flash: Huh?
Hawkgirl: The home of the Amazons. I always thought it was merely a legend.
Wonder Woman: I assure you, it's as real as the ground on which we stand.

Wonder Woman: I am Diana. Princess of the Amazons.
The Flash: Pinch me, I must be dreaming.
[Superman elbows him in the ribs]
The Flash: Ow.

The Flash: [Green Lantern has suggested splitting up into teams to defeat the aliens] Dibs on the Amazon.

The Flash: Look, I'm usually pretty quick on the uptake, but would someone please tell me what the heck is goin' on here?

The Flash: This is too weird.
Green Lantern: I've seen stranger things.

J'onn J'onzz: The invaders are noctural. They want to blot out the sun so they can live in perpetual darkness.
The Flash: [to Batman] Friends of yours?

The Flash: You are no fun.
Green Lantern: This isn't supposed to be fun.

Green Lantern: Now listen up, here's the plan.
The Flash: What plan? We kick their butts, right; let's get this over with.

Green Lantern: Of all the idiotic, boneheaded, glory-grabbing moves. Haven't you ever heard of teamwork?
The Flash: [a laser-shot fires near where he's being freed] Um, maybe we better save the motivational speeches for *later*?


Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths (2010) (V)
Batman: All right, Flash. Beginning test run.
Flash: I don't know, Batman. This is pretty radical. You're absolutely sure it works?
Batman: Pretty sure.
Flash: Pretty sure? That isn't...
[Batman teleports Flash aboard new headquarters]
Flash: ...good enough.
Batman: Teleporter's online.
Flash: Are you crazy? Is he crazy? How could he use that thing on me if the wasn't sure?
J'onn J'onzz: He was joking.
Flash: Yeah, how can you tell?
Wonder Woman: You really think he would risk your life if he wasn't sure?
Flash: Well, maybe. I mean, I don't think he likes me very much.
J'onn J'onzz: I don't think he likes anyone very much.

Flash: How are we supposed to get inside again?
Lex Luthor: Multi-frequency band, encryption analyzer-replicator pack.
Flash: Some of us don't speak Star Trek.
Lex Luthor: Think of it as a fancy garage-door opener.

[Flash bumps into the invisible plane]
Wonder Woman: Mind your head.
Flash: I can't believe you kept that thing.
Wonder Woman: Spoils of war. I like it.
Flash: What do you need a plane for anyway? You can fly.
Green Lantern: You drive a car.
Flash: That is *so* not the point.

Model Citizen: You don't wanna fight me. You wanna help me.
Flash: I don't wanna fight you, I want...
[snaps out of her control]
Flash: Hey, this is like the Jedi mind trick.
Model Citizen: This is not like the Jedi mind trick.
Flash: This is not like the Jedi mind trick.

Superman: We're gonna hit multiple targets at the same time. Teams of two.
Lex Luthor: We'd be hopelessly outnumbered. When my Justice League fought them...
Superman: All due respect, Lex. We're aren't your Justice League.
Flash: What's the call?
Superman: You and J'onn. Diana and GL. He's with me.
Lex Luthor: That's insane.
Flash: Don't worry, Lex. He's got your slack.
Superman: Flash.
Flash: Well, you do.

Superwoman: Enjoy yourselves while you can. My friends are gonna tear you apart.
Flash: Told you we should have left her.
Wonder Woman: We couldn't take the chance she'd escape and warn them we're coming.
Superwoman: When I get lose, I'm killing you right after Batman. Uhh!
Wonder Woman: [punches Superwoman] Doesn't mean we have to listen to her, though.

Flash: Are we there yet?
Green Lantern: That wasn't funny the first 15 times you said it, either.

Flash: [sees a naked Lex] Oh, and they call me The Flash.


"Justice League: The Brave and the Bold: Part II (#1.13)" (2002)
Gorilla Grodd: Stand still and fight me, you simpleton!
The Flash: We could do that. Tell you what - you ditch the mind-control helmet, and I'll ditch the headband.
Solivar: Flash, don't!
The Flash: Come on, "gorilla my dreams"! Take off the helmet.
[Flash removes his headband and tosses it away. Grodd looks incredulous, then smiles, not removing his helmet]
Gorilla Grodd: Heh. You're a bigger fool than I thought.
The Flash: Oh, yeah? Well, you're... naked!
[Flash shrugs at Solivar]
Gorilla Grodd: The world will miss your sparkling intellect. Goodbye, Flash.
[He puts his hands to his helmet... and screams as the helmet feeds back on itself. Grodd collapses]
Dr. Sarah Corwin: What have you done to him?
The Flash: Simple. When I pushed the helmet down over his eyes, I also crossed some wires.
Dr. Sarah Corwin: How could you? You've destroyed the greatest mind on Earth!
The Flash: You'll be okay. Now that you're free from his mind control.
Dr. Sarah Corwin: What are you talking about? He never used that on me. I loved him!
The Flash: Internet romances huh? Go figure.

[as the mind-controlled mob closes in]
Solivar: Flash, I can't hold them off much longer!
The Flash: How much do you weigh?
Solivar: About four-hundred of your pounds, why do you aaaaaaaaaa-?
[he trails off as Flash lifts him up and streaks away, taking them both out of the mob's reach. Flash drops him]
The Flash: [wheezing] Four-hundred pounds, huh? You sure you did the math right?

The Flash: Oh. Not again! What did I miss this time?

The Flash: [turning to Solivar after Dr Corwin reveals she was in love with Grodd] Internet romances - who'd have thought it?

The Flash: Not bad, huh? I outsmarted a super genius!
Green Lantern: Maybe you're not as dumb as you look!
[walks away]
The Flash: Yeah, and I... Hey!
[chases after Green Lantern]
The Flash: I resent that! No one's makes a monkey out of me!
[Grodd, after getting his mind wiped by the feedback of his helmet, sits idle in the cage, then suddenly makes an angry look at the heroes as they leave, showing he's not through yet]

Solivar: Perhaps the shield frightened them.
The Flash: Maybe, but when a city is this empty it usually means flesh-eating zombies are involved.
Green Lantern: You watch too many movies.
Solivar: Ssh. Listen.
The Flash: [approaching hearing an eerie noise] Maybe *you* don't watch *enough*.

The Flash: [of the rocket-bike] I've gotta get me one of those.

Solivar: Hurry! Before Grodd finds out we're here!
[an alert sounds]
The Flash: I get the feeling he already knows!
Green Lantern: No! That's a launch alert!
[four missiles launch from the base, Green Lantern flies up after them]
Green Lantern: I'll go after the missiles! You stop Grodd!
The Flash: Right! Stop Grodd, how?


"Justice League: In Blackest Night: Part II (#1.5)" (2001)
[after learning that he will also be executed if he defends Green Lantern and loses]
The Flash: That's crazy!
Prosecutor: No. That's how we solved our lawyer problem.

The Flash: If the ring wasn't lit, you must acquit.

The Flash: [about to start defending John Stewart in court] But before I begin, I'd like to talk a little about... uh... habeus corpus. Yeah, habeus corpus! And ipso... facto! Yeah, and Phi Beta Kappa!

Superman: Flash, Hawkgirl, can you buy us some time in court?
The Flash: You're asking the world's fastest man to slow things down?

John Stewart: Flash, I told you not to get involved.
The Flash: I'm railroading you, pal.

Prosecutor: [of Kiliwog] He was nowhere near the crime, what kind of witness can he be?
The Flash: [grinning] A big scary one.

Green Lantern: You believed in me, even when I didn't believe in myself.
The Flash: Hey, what are friends for?


"Justice League: Eclipsed: Part II (#2.14)" (2003)
The Flash: How do we fight it, or them?
Mophir: Two ways. Pure light from Mophir's gem drives evil spirits back into Dark Heart.
The Flash: Great. What's the second way?
Mophir: Separate host head from body.
The Flash: Bummer.

[as the sun is slowly going out]
Superman: How can we stop it?
J'onn J'onzz: There is one possibility. To halt the process, we would need to create an Einstein-Rosen bridge to drain off the infecting anti-fusion matter.
The Flash: Create a what to do what?
Hawkgirl: Make a wormhole to suck away the bad stuff.
The Flash: Oh.

The Flash: This night couldn't get any worse. My sponsors just dropped me and they're all out of iced mochas.

The Flash: This has gotta be a nightmare. When the sun comes up you'll all be human. In a superpowered, alien kind of way.

Hawkgirl: I'll be seeing spots for a year.
The Flash: If you're lucky.

The Flash: [awakening] Swirly lights... fuzzy grilled cheese...

Wonder Woman: How are you feeling?
The Flash: Actually - kind of faint. I think I need some mouth-to-mouth.
Hawkgirl: He's fine.


"Super Friends: Too Hot to Handle (#1.7)" (1973)
Mr. SIngh: Hurry, Flash.
The Flash: That's what I do best, Mr. Singh.

The Flash: I'll have us wrapped up in a flash.

Robin: He's really something, that Flash.
The Flash: [bursts in] Did I hear someone call my name? Sorry I took so long, but I had to stop for a red light.

The Flash: Come on, Wonder Dog. We're going for a ride.

The Flash: [causing him to jump into his arms] Let's go, Wonder Dog. We'll be late for the party. Hop aboard the Malibar Express.
[blazes off into the cave]

The Flash: When you think about it, humans, you, me, everybody - we're the only creature who're able to upset the balance of nature.
Aquaman: And the only ones able to maintain it.


"Justice League: Only a Dream: Part II (#2.6)" (2003)
Green Lantern: [Dr. Destiny's turned himself into a giant] I got his eyes.
Superman: Gut.
The Flash: Big toe.

Kid: [after watching a movie about him] That was some sweet banter, Uncle Flash. But what's a cur?
The Flash: Uh... A bad person, I guess.
Kid: OK, so why didn't you just say that?
The Flash: Um...
Kid: And do people really talk so much when they're fighting?
The Flash: Uh... Tou want a snack?

Kid: [Flash has just managed to slam the door on a giant frog found in the fridge] Where's my food?
The Flash: Are you French?
Kid: No.
The Flash: Then there's no food.

Dr. Destiny: You went too fast. And you're never going to be able to slow down again.
The Flash: Now I get it. It's a dream. Same one I've been having since I got my speed. And here's where the Swedish bikini team comes in to keep me company.

The Flash: Teamwork. What a concept.

Hawkgirl: Wait a second. Is this another dream?
The Flash: I could pinch ya...
Hawkgirl: It's real.


"Justice League: Hearts and Minds (#2.9)" (2003)
The Flash: [searching John Stewart's refrigerator] Aha, I knew it! Johhny does have a kink in his armor.
[takes a tub of ice cream out of the freezer]
The Flash: Bob and Terry's.
Kilowog: [takes the ice cream tub and eats it whole] Delicious!
The Flash: Right. Stick with me, big guy, I'll open up a whole new world for you.
[runs over to the TV]
The Flash: Hey, check this out: People's exhibit B, "Old Yeller".
Kilowog: [takes the tape and eats it whole] Delicious!

The Flash: Hey, you two wanna keep it down? You sound like an old married couple.

The Flash: Lucky for the Big K we've got Martian care on our League HMO.
J'onn J'onzz: Bolovax's physiology is very similar to my own.
Hawkgirl: And how much of this is guesswork?
J'onn J'onzz: ...I would rather not say.

The Flash: Hey, big guy.
Kilowog: Hey, little poozer.
J'onn J'onzz: He'll be fine now.
The Flash: Great. Can we keep 'im?

The Flash: He was teacher's pet? Go, GL.

The Flash: [John Stewart's landlady attacks him and Kiliwog with a broom] Nice meetin' ya, ma'am, if we never need a replacement for Hawkgirl...


"Justice League: Divided We Fall (#4.12)" (2005)
Brainiac: [after capturing the Justice League] You are defeated. Any unique information that dwells within you will by digitized. Your physical forms will be deleted. Such is the ultimate fate of this world, but for you, the end comes now.
[Brainiac produces a series of metallic tendrils from his body and begins plugging them into the League members, one by one, and they begin screaming]
The Flash: I am so willing to wait my turn.
[Brainiac plugs into Flash]

Android Flash: Slacker! Child! Clown! We have no place here among the world's greatest heroes.
The Flash: Says you! I got a seat at the big conference table. I'm gonna paint my logo on it!
[Flash punches through Android Flash and vibrates his fist until it explodes. Flash is blown back, painfully]
The Flash: Uh, never doing that again.

[Flash taps into the Speed Force to defeat Luthor, then rises, crackling with energy]
The Flash: I feel kinda... funny.
[He disappears]
Wonder Woman: Flash!
[the League stares in horror, and Luthor chuckles weakly]
Lex Luthor: What do you know? I did kill him.
[He looks up and sees Superman]
Lex Luthor: I was mistaken earlier. I think this is the part where you kill me.
[Superman picks him with one arm and holds him at arm's length with eyes glowing. Wonder Woman starts forward, but Batman holds her back. After a moment Superman's eyes stop glowing, and he leans his face close to Luthor's]
Superman: I'm not the man who killed President Luthor. Right now, I wish to heaven that I were. But I'm not.

The Flash: [about the fused Luthor/Brainiac] Hate to interrupt this special live performance of The Thing With Two Heads, but it's time to go to jail now.
Amanda Waller: What he said.

The Flash: You lose.
[Two metal tendrils grab Flash's arms and hold him in place]
Lex Luthor, Brainiac: Hardly. Look around you. The Justice League is completely defeated, and so are you. For all your efforts, you have but inconvenienced me, speck. But I'm still just human enough to enjoy taking my revenge. Looks like the Question was right all along: I kill you and then Armageddon, right on schedule.
The Flash: No!

The Flash: I can never go that fast again. If I do... I don't think I'm coming back.


"Justice League: Tabula Rasa: Part II (#2.4)" (2003)
Batman: Has anyone checked the sewer?
The Flash: Uh... maybe GL and the big guy need some backup.
[takes off]

The Flash: [runs past the others flying to the house] Slow-
[an explosion knocks him back from the door; to Superman]
The Flash: Next time I let *you* go first.

The Flash: Grab whatever you can. And watch out for the wind.
Superman: What wind?
[Superman blows a gust of air to beat back the fire]

The Flash: It's all making sense now, even to me.

The Flash: Come on, chump, over -
[breaks off seeing Amazo take off with his own speed]
Amazo: [from behind] Here?
[grabs him by the throat]
The Flash: [pointing to behind Amazo] You're just too fast for me, bro. But not him.
Amazo: Oldest trick in the bo-
[Green Lantern blasts him]

The Flash: I say we let 'em waste each other.
Hawkgirl: Since when do we do what *you* say?


Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox (2013) (V)
Green Lantern: Clearly, you should never do this stuff without me. You end up with crap all over yourself.
The Flash: Focus, GL. Bombs.

[hands Professor Zoom's costume to Barry]
Batman: Here. You need a suit, and I'm not about to loan you one of mine. What? It's friction-proof, isn't it?
The Flash: [changes Zoom's suit into The Flash] I had to at least make some last-minute alterations.

The Flash: Why aren't you telling him about me and the timeline?
Batman: I'm not lying.
The Flash: You're misleading him. He has a right to know what our real plan is.
Batman: Don't preach to me. I got enough misplaced morality to handle the big metal Boy Scout on our hands. He wants to stop the war. So do we. That's all he needs to know.

The Flash: Bruce's Batplane was a little more stoic.
Batman: Your Batman didn't have to ferry high rollers with deep pockets in and out of his casino.
Cyborg: So he wouldn't need a fully stocked bar aboard.
Batman: Everything is top shelf. Help yourself.
Cyborg: I don't drink.
The Flash: Shocking.

Professor Zoom: As long as I can siphon off the Speed Force, you can't escape this timeline. I'm afraid there just isn't enough Speed Force to go around.
Batman: [shoots Zoom in the head] There is now.
The Flash: You killed him.
Batman: Not necessarily. Not if you go back in time and fix this. The only way to save the world is to keep this from ever happening.

The Flash: [about Flash's Mother] I just wanted to save her.
Professor Zoom: Her hero; how noble. Oh, wait! You didn't stop JFK from getting assassinated or make sure Hitler stayed in art school. You saved your mommy. You missed her.
[starts kicking Flash]
Professor Zoom: And in a supreme act of selfishness shattered history like a rank amateur, turned the world into a living hell moments away from destruction and *I'm* the villain?


Justice League: The New Frontier (2008) (V)
Superman: I see I have your attention. We face a threat big enough to wipe us off the Earth. And still we bicker about a mask or a uniform. My best friend is lying upstairs right now. She would have given her life for this country and I could hardly look her in the eye. America was founded on the notion that a person should be free to follow his or her own destiny. But we can't do that if we're living in fear of our own government. We need to reclaim this country for free men and women everywhere.
The Flash: What about your government friends?
King Faraday: That's a fair question. Superman's right! The persecution and paranoia have to stop. From here on, we work together as free Americans.
[Superman and Faraday shake hands]
Superman: I'm gonna fly now and recon this thing. When I get back, we'll work out a strategy. ARE YOU WITH ME?
[the crowd cheers]

The Flash: Sorry to interrupt. There's something I have to get off my chest. I've always used my power to help people. But now the government's on my tail, hunting me. You just saw what happened to John Wilson. America needs people like him. But where are they going to come from if the government keeps acting this way? As for me, I'm quitting, giving it up. Breaks my heart, but there are people I love. I don't want anything to happen to them. So good night, everybody. And good luck!

The Flash: [about the Green Lantern] That guy with the ring, he wasn't a part of the plan. Or wasn't I listening?

The Flash: Hey, Ace, what happened to that buddy of yours?
Ace Morgan: Hal Jordan? If I knew him, he's up there somewhere tear-assing around.

Captain Cold: [about to be speed-punched] WAIT!
[the Flash stops]
The Flash: Make it quick!

The Flash: Don't EVER mess with my Iris!


"Justice League: Secret Origins: Part III (#1.3)" (2001)
Superman: I once thought I could protect the world by myself, but I was wrong. Working together, we saved the planet and I believe that is we stayed together as a team, we could be a force that could truly work for the ideals of peace and justice.
The Flash: What, like a bunch of Superfriends?
Superman: More like a Justice League.

The Flash: [of J'onn] Can we trust this space case?
Green Lantern: What choice do we have?

The Flash: [after causing the alien war-machine to lose a leg trying to catch him, it falls over and explodes] B'bye.

The Flash: [after J'onn transforms into one of the aliens to defeat them] Is it just me, or does he creep you out too?

The Flash: [Whisks Batman out of where the spaceship wreckage falls a second later] We'd hate to lose you again.

The Flash: [of the Justice League] Do you have any idea how corny that sounds?


"Justice League: The Great Brain Robbery (#5.8)" (2006)
[Lex-as-Flash hides in a bathroom in the Watchtower to escape the pursuing League members]
The Flash: [panting] Lex, you're having a difficult day.
[looking in the mirror]
The Flash: Hmm... if nothing else, I can at least learn the Flash's secret identity.
[Lex unmasks and looks in the mirror, then frowns]
The Flash: I have no idea who this is.

The Flash: Guys! I was starting to think I was gonna go out as the bottom of a super villain dog pile.
John Stewart: It sounds like Wally, but is there any way to be *sure*?
The Flash: You want proof? Until he went off to the Marines, GL's nickname was...
John Stewart: STOP! It's him! You promised never to repeat that story.
The Flash: I know. I was just messing with your head.

[Lex-as-Flash prepares to teleport off the Watchtower. Mr. Terrific hits a button]
Computer: Artificial gravity off.
[Flash floats off the teleport pad]
Mr. Terrific: Speed's no good without gravity.
The Flash: That's where you're wrong.
[He windmills his arm, propelling himself down. Mr. Terrific hits the button again]
Computer: Artificial gravity on.
The Flash: AH!
[Flash slams into the pad, knocking himself out]
Mr. Terrific: Dr. Fate, your patient just anesthetized himself.

Mr. Terrific: Can you tell us anything about Grodd's secret society? Where's their Headquarters?
The Flash: I don't know. In a swamp...

The Flash: Just be careful with my head - it's where I keep all my one-liners.


"Justice League: Paradise Lost: Part II (#1.9)" (2002)
The Flash: [holding a mace in Faust's apartment] Where did he get this stuff - Warlocks 'R' Us?

The Flash: Now you see me, now you don't.

The Flash: [battling growing vines] Anybody got some weedkiller?

The Flash: [being pursued by Hades' exhaled flame] Whoo, give this guy a breath-mint.

The Flash: After she hands out the medals, how about you and me take a private tour of paradise?
[gets a confused look from the Amazon]
The Flash: She wants me.
J'onn J'onzz: [sarcastically] Indeed.


"Justice League: Legends: Part II (#1.17)" (2002)
The Flash: That's it. I officially want to go home.

The Flash: Is it just me or are those two the only cops in this town?

J'onn J'onzz: The nuclear fallout from the war mutated his DNA, giving him the ability to mold this world to his choosing.
Hawkgirl: So he chose to recreate it with the heroes he worshipped as a child.
The Flash: Who could blame 'im?

The Flash: You should've been there. It was so freaky. Those cornball villains with their bad puns, and the heroes with the decoder rings! What's up with that? Still, Black Siren *was* a hottie.

Green Lantern: Haven't you noticed that nothing here makes sense? Library books with blank pages. Ice cream trucks that never stop.
Hawkgirl: Dangers that spring up whenever someone gets too close to the truth.
Green Guardsman: What truth?
Green Lantern: That your world is an illusion, a living memory of a civilization that was destroyed 30 years ago. When The Justice Guild gave their lives for this Earth,
[Tosses the newspaper with the headline JGA Killed In Battle in front of them]
Green Lantern: that's why they stopped publishing the comic in our world. No more Justice Guild.
Hawkgirl: And anytime someone tries to figure things out...
The Flash: ...nuns and dynamite.
Tom Turbine: If what you say is true, who or what is creating this illusion?
J'onn J'onzz: I suggest you ask Ray.
The Streak: Ray?
Ray Thompson: Why would I know anything?
J'onn J'onzz: Because you are the source.
[puts his hands on Ray's shoulders, then his eyes glow followed by Ray's glowing as well, then Ray suddenly cringes]
Ray Thompson: NOOOOOOOOO!
[He morphs into his true self, a mutated creature with torn up clothes and different length arms and a big head, everyone else gasps in shock]
Ray Thompson: You ruined it! You ruined everything!
[fires a beam from his forehead right into J'onn J'onzz's chest, knocking him back towards The Flash, Cat Man, and Black Siren who catch him as he falls unconscious, then a giant red mechanical monster tears the roof off]
The Flash: That's it, I officially want to go home.


Superhero Fight Club 2.0 (2016) (V)
Green Arrow: If you don't know why you're here, you're about to find out.
Supergirl: You do know I let you kidnap me, right?
Green Arrow: No, we would've taken you.
The Flash: I really doubt it.
Supergirl: Not unless you have a kryptonite arrow in that quiver.
Green Arrow: Hmm, anyway.
Supergirl: So what's with all the mysterious mystery?
Green Arrow: [to Flash] You tell her.
Supergirl: Wait a sec, is this that Fight Club thing? Cool, I've heard so much about this! I'm so excited.
The Atom: You thought the abduction was cool? You're really going to like the upgrades.
The Flash: We felt we had to up the ante for someone of your abilities.
Supergirl: This is awesome. Is this where you train?
The Atom: It's more of a team-up training facility with Team Tech pulling the strings.

Green Arrow: Okay, there's six of us and one of them. I think we need to...
The Atom: Team-up?
Green Arrow, The Flash: Stop saying team-up!

The Flash: You think that's bad? Try running with these on your feet.

Supergirl: That was awesome! What else you guys got?
Felicity Smoak: Yeah, Cisco. What else you got?
Cisco Ramon: I'm so glad you asked.
[releases Grodd]
The Flash: The only other rule of Super Hero Fight Club is never ask for more Fight Club.
Supergirl: Oh, God. Monkey!
The Flash: Bad monkey.
Grodd: Not God, Grodd!

The Atom: [to Supergirl] Way to go, new girl. You cracked the code.
The Flash: Looks like you're our new team savior.
The Sphere: I don't understand. Team Savior is your name. Activate Team Taser.
White Canary: Wait, what?


"Justice League: The Savage Time (#1.24)" (2002)
[the league members are confronted by Nazi officers in an alternate universe]
Nazi Soldier: [demanding] Let's see your identity papers, now!
The Flash: Sorry, but my identity's a secret. Chicks dig that whole "man of mystery" thing.

The Flash: Bats, you're starting to scare me.
Bruce Wayne: I scare a lot of people.

The Flash: Great Jumpin' Hera!

[on a speeding train, the League are all thrown into a pile]
Hawkgirl: Whose hand is that?
The Flash: Sorry.

The Flash: This is too weird... even for him.


"Justice League: Eclipsed (#2.13)" (2003)
The Flash: Hey, we should take a road trip!
Green Lantern: What?
The Flash: Think about it - two hard-travelling heroes cruising the countryside looking for America.
Green Lantern: Uh, yeah, I'll let you know when my schedule frees up.

[after an obnoxious talk-show host insults Wonder Woman]
Wonder Woman: [demanding] And what's wrong with the way I dress?
The Flash: [to Green Lantern] Uh... you wanna take that?

The Flash: Where do these nuts come from?

Green Lantern: He torched the sewers.
The Flash: [grinning] I was wondering what that smell was.

[the Flash makes a surprise appearance on Gordon Godfrey's TV show]
Glorious Gordon Godfrey: Ladies and gentlemen, it seems we have an unexpected guest. Not that we should be surprised. I mean, you're a superhero. You don't have to wait for an invitation. You go where you want, when you want. Right?
The Flash: Yeah, but... we're the good guys!
Glorious Gordon Godfrey: Of course you are! And I'm sure you can account for the fact that since your so-called 'Justice League' formed, white-collar crime is up three percent!
The Flash: White-collar? That's not really our...
Glorious Gordon Godfrey: Or maybe you'd care to explain why, on your watch, 50 percent of marriages now end in divorce... and the other 50 percent in death!


Justice League: Doom (2012) (V)
The Flash: Batman, you okay?
Batman: I'll live.
Superman: So will Ace, apparently.
Martian Manhunter: He's still a little embarrassed from last time.
Superman: He sucker-punched me.

The Flash: Found him.
Batman: You fast enough to go in there and knock him out before he glances in your general direction?
The Flash: We could just wait until his eye laser runs out of power.
Batman: Flank him. I'll make sure he stays inside until you get there.
The Flash: That will work too.

Batman: I've carefully studied every Justice Leaguer, past and present and created contingency plans to neutralize you should that become necessary.
The Flash: You've gotta be kidding me.
Batman: Neutralize, not kill. Whoever implemented my plans altered them.
Wonder Woman: It's still a completely unacceptable breach of our trust.
Batman: The members of the Justice League are among the most powerful and potentially dangerous people on the planet.
The Flash: You think one of us would go over to the other side?
Batman: Or succumb to mind control. Yes, it's impossible. That's why I developed plans for containing any of all members of the JLA should the need ever arise.
Superman: None of us would ever do that to you.
Batman: Then you're damned fools.

The Flash: You never asked me how my wrist was healing.
Mirror Master: Fine, how's your...? Unh!
The Flash: [punches him] Surprisingly fast.

Superman: In light of the recent breach of trust revealed to us during the Vandal Savage matter, we have to decide whether Batman should remain in the League. All those in favor of...
Wonder Woman: Wait. Before we vote, I believe the accused should be allowed a few words in his defense.
Green Lantern: Seconded.
Superman: Okay. Batman?
Batman: My actions don't require any defense. In the same situation, I'd do it again.
The Flash: Aw, come on!
Batman: As individuals, and even more so as a group, the Justice League is far too dangerous to lack a failsafe against any possible misuse of our power.
Wonder Woman: We use our power to protect the world. We always have.
Batman: And what if we ever used it for some other purpose?
[rises from his seat]
Batman: If you people can't see the potential danger of an out-of-control Justice League, I don't need to wait for a vote. I don't belong here.
[walks out of the room]


"Justice League: I Am Legion (#5.1)" (2005)
[regarding Flash's crush on Fire]
Hawkgirl: Why don't you just go talk to her?
The Flash: Who, me? Talk to her? Heh, no way...
Hawkgirl: Yeah, you'd probably be wasting your time. I hear she's, you know...
[Flash looks over at Fire, who is talking with Ice, another super-heroine. His eyes widen, guessing what Hawkgirl's about to say]
Hawkgirl: ...Brazilian.
The Flash: [unamused] Ha, ha.

[Fire is holding Flash in the air while Hawkgirl is fighting a flying robot]
The Flash: That thing's gonna blow! You need both hands to help Shayera, drop me!
[she looks at him, uncertain. He winks at her. She smiles and lets go, then flies after Hawkgirl]
The Flash: Sure hope I think of something before I hit the ground...

Hawkgirl: He told you to drop him?
Fire: [miserable] He's a senior member of the team...
Hawkgirl: You know he can't fly, right?
[Flash appears, whirling his hands so fast they're propelling him up in the air]
The Flash: Hey, ladies! Check me out! I'm just like a helicopter!
[he loses control and falls face-first onto the ground]
The Flash: I'm sort of like a helicopter...

[after Flash narrowly survives a death-defying fall]
Hawkgirl: DON'T YOU EVER SCARE ME LIKE THAT AGAIN!
[stalks off]
The Flash: [to Fire] She loves me. Seriously, she's like the big sister I never had. Only, you know, short.

[last lines]
Fire: All I know is, Superman's gonna be pretty ticked that we let Luthor get away just to keep some musty old museum from being destroyed.
[Flash looks and sees Chuck and Hawkgirl standing at attention before the Blackhawk memorial - Chuck saluting, Hawkgirl with head bowed]
The Flash: It was worth it.


"Justice League: A Better World: Part II (#2.12)" (2003)
The Flash: So you're not a Boy Scout after all.
Superman: Never made it past my first merit badge.

The Flash: [Lorder Superman has Flash by the throat] Can't do it, can you? I'm the last piece of your conscience. That's the one thing you'll never do.
Lord Superman: I've done a lot of things I thought I'd never do these last two years. One more won't hurt.

Batman: I didn't know you could do that.
The Flash: Neither did I. But I had to come with *some*thing if *you* weren't going to.
Batman: I couldn't. Not with him anticipating everything I'd ever think of. But who could anticipate you?

The Flash: So, without your Flash, the Justice Lords went rogue?
Lord Batman: It wasn't quite that simple.
The Flash: Hey, he was the conscience of your group, and that means I must be...
Green Lantern: Come on, Jiminy.


"Justice League: Starcrossed: Part III (#2.26)" (2004)
J'onn J'onzz: [examining Thanagarian controls] I have no idea how to fly this vehicle.
The Flash: [pressing button] What's this do?
[a laser blasts open a window in Wayne Manor]
Batman: [through clenched teeth] That's-not-helping.

J'onn J'onzz: We're running out of time. I'll take the information from him.
The Flash: I thought you said you couldn't read their minds.
J'onn J'onzz: I'll just have to try...
[eyes start glowing yellow]
J'onn J'onzz: *Harder*.
[places his hands on Kragger's head]

[Batman plans to de-orbit the Watchtower and drop it onto the Thanagarian's forcefield generator. He, J'onn, and Flash load the unconscious Thanagarians into the escape pods]
J'onn J'onzz: Is that the last of them?
The Flash: Yeah. The tower's completely pest-free.
Batman: Good.
[He steps back and presses "launch," shutting the door between them]
The Flash: Hey!
[the escape pod launches, leaving Batman behind]
J'onn J'onzz: What are you doing?
Batman: I can't risk having the Watchtower burn up on re-entry. I'll have to guide it in manually. Gentlemen... it's been an honor.

Green Lantern: [of the generator] It's behind a forcefield.
Batman: A forcefield controlled from the command ship. Go shut it down. I'll take care of the generator.
The Flash: That thing's the size of a city. What are you gonna do, throw a Batarang at it?
Batman: Something like that.


"Justice League: The Balance (#4.5)" (2005)
The Flash: Silly me - making dinner plans with two beautiful women on the same night.

The Flash: It's a chance for us to get reacquainted, patch things up.
Wonder Woman: Assuming we want to.

The Flash: I always thought the reason you two don't get along is because you're so much alike.
Wonder Woman, Shayera Hol: Like *her*?
[he grins]

The Flash: [everyone in the commissary stares after him as he calls after Diana and Shayera that they're not trying to reconcile] I went out with two girls at the same time... 'cause I'm a stud.
[notices his elbow in salad dressing]


"Supergirl: Worlds Finest (#1.18)" (2016)
The Flash: [Supergirl lands as Flash speeds to a stop] How did you do that?
Supergirl: I'm Supergirl.
The Flash: [Voice rising in surprise] You're who now?
Supergirl: How did you save me?
The Flash: Well I... Y... You fell out a window and I... I caught you and... ran you... all the way out here, which I did NOT mean to do but I've been working on my speed and... Guess I'm faster than I thought.
Supergirl: Yes, yes but I...
[Takes a breath]
Supergirl: Who ARE you?
The Flash: [Taken aback] I'm The Flash.
Supergirl: The who now?
The Flash: The... Wait, do you not know who I am?
Supergirl: Should I?
The Flash: What about the Green Arrow?
[Supergirl makes a questioning face and shrugs]
The Flash: Black Canary?
[Supergirl shakes her head]
The Flash: Firestorm? Atom? Zoom?
Supergirl: [Shows regret and some embarrassment] Sorry.
The Flash: [sighs] Oh, boy. Not as sorry as I am.
[Flash removes mask and sighs again]
The Flash: Hey, I'm Barry Allen. I'm the fastest man alive. Also I think I am on the wrong Earth. I'm gonna need your help.

Supergirl: For the record, I got here first.
The Flash: Yeah, for the record, I went around the block to check the perimeter. So, technically, I let you get here first.

The Flash: You and I join forces. Literally. We combine your speed with my speed. If you throw me forward at your fastest, then I might just break the dimensional barrier and get back home.
Supergirl: What? What do you mean? Like a race?
The Flash: Yeah, I guess. Think you can keep up, Girl of Steel?
Supergirl: Just you watch, Scarlet Speedster.

The Flash: [to Livewire and Silver Banshee, holding Cat hostage] Hey, Sparky! Shrieky! Hi. What do you say we step away from the nice lady, settle this like women?
[Supergirl looks at Barry quizzically]
The Flash: What? It's more of you guys here than me.


"Justice League: Hereafter (#2.19)" (2003)
Toyman: [happily] Superman go bye-bye!
[long pause. Wonder Woman destroys his Robot and approaches Toyman, Toyman pulls out a water gun]
Toyman: Stay back, it's full of acid!
Wonder Woman: [knocks the water gun out his hand and picks up Toyman with one arm] Do I *look* like I'm playing games?
Toyman: What are you going to do to me?
Wonder Woman: [tears streaming down her face] I'm going to punch a hole in your head.
Flash: [Flash grabs Wonder Woman's punching arm] We don't do that to our enemies.
Wonder Woman: Speak for yourself.
Flash: I'm trying to speak for Superman.
[Wonder Woman releases Toyman. Flash releases Wonder Woman]

Flash: [after Wonder Woman used her bracelets to ward off a lightning bolt] There are *so* many reasons why that shouldn't have worked.

[in the Watchtower, the League is holding a wake for Superman]
John Stewart: And Superman holds the grenade in his hands, like this. So it blows, and he doesn't even move. And I say, "are you all right?" And he says...
Flash: This is the best part!
John Stewart: He says, "Fine. And you?"
[all laugh]

J'onn J'onzz: I must admit, I'm also having doubts about the League's future.
Flash: Never thought I'd hear that kind of talk from you, J'onn.
J'onn J'onzz: How many battles did we win, simply because he was there?
Flash: Yeah. I used to be able to goof around so much because I knew Superman had my back. Now all I've got is his example. And that's gonna have to be enough.


"Arrow: My Name Is Oliver Queen (#3.23)" (2015)
The Flash: [looking at the Lazarus Pit] You guys have a hot tub? Nice.

The Flash: Hi, you guys! Wow! This is like a real dungeon!
Felicity Smoak: Barry!
The Flash: Thank you, Felicity. You just outed my secret identity to a super villain. No offense.
Malcolm Merlyn: None taken. Now get us out of here!

Felicity Smoak: Thank you. And not to be greedy, but we could really use your help on this whole Starling City super virus thing.
The Flash: And you know I would, but I am overdue with for a very pointed conversation with Harrison Wells. I'm sure Oliver's got this.
John Diggle: I wouldn't count on it.
Laurel Lance: Oliver hasn't been very forthcoming with his plans lately.
The Flash: Well, I don't know what's been going on with him lately, apart from a recent wardrobe change. But one thing that hasn't changed is, he needs you guys. Even if he doesn't think so. Good luck.
[he speeds away]
John Diggle: I'll never get used to that.

The Flash: Hi, guys! Wow, this is like a real, actual dungeon!
Felicity Smoak: Barry!
The Flash: Thank you, Felicity. You just outed my secret identity to a super-villain. No offense.


"Justice League: Hearts and Minds: Part II (#2.10)" (2003)
The Flash: Hey, GL, did you miss me?
Green Lantern: Like a toothache!

Katma Tui: [warning John Stewart] Or you can learn to live with your emerald impotence?
[Flash walks by at the end of the sentence]
The Flash: Impotence?
[John and Katma glare at him]
The Flash: Right... I was just going over there.
[speeds off]

The Flash: Ah, you must be the mystery woman.
Katma Tui: And you must be...?
The Flash: Delighted to meet ya.

The Flash: Hey, Kiliwog, bratworst, my place, next week.
Kilowog: You're on, little poozer.
[to Katma]
Kilowog: What's a bratworst?


"Justice League: Legends (#1.16)" (2002)
The Flash: Hey, cookie.
Hawkgirl: One word and you'll be the fastest man alive with a limp.

The Flash: Like I said, you never had a snowball's chance in...
Black Siren: Flash, look!
[a dynamite truck is about to crash into a bus filled with nuns]
The Flash: You've gotta be kidding!

Dr. Blizzard: If you'll excuse me, Mr. Mayor, I'll be taking off with my "chill"-gotten gains.
The Flash: Chill out, Blizzard. We're putting you on ice!
Dr. Blizzard: Forgive me if I give you the cold shoulder.

Green Lantern: This can't be real.
The Flash: Tell me about it. I almost busted a gut during that roll-call routine.
Green Lantern: It's not that, it's the Justice Guild. They're... comic-book characters.
The Flash: What?
Green Lantern: When I was a kid, my uncle James had the biggest comic-book collection I've ever seen. I'd go to his house everyday after school and we'd read old comics all afternoon.
The Flash: So?
Green Lantern: So... The Streak, Tom Turbine, Green Guardsman... they were the stars of my favorite comic-book: The Justice Guild of America.
The Flash: This is too weird.
Green Lantern: I know it sounds corny, but... those comics taught me what it meant to be a hero. Without them, well... maybe I wouldn't have this ring today.
The Flash: Ooo-kay.


"The Flash: The Reverse-Flash Returns (#2.11)" (2016)
Cisco Ramon: You've been playing good Samaritan all morning. Take a break. Are you sure you don't want to get to CCPD, give Patty your attention?
The Flash: No, I can see her later.
Dr. Harrison Wells: 'Cause we can't afford to waste any more time.
Cisco Ramon: What, 'cause we've just been sipping Mai Tais since you got here?
Dr. Harrison Wells: I don't know what you've been sipping since I got here, but Barry needs to get better, stronger, faster. We need to train to prepare for Zoom.
Cisco Ramon: Oh, I see. You haven't had your coffee this morning.
Dr. Harrison Wells: I had my coffee this morning. Don't slurp. Don't. Don't. Don't.

Reverse-Flash: Flash.
The Flash: Eobard Thawne.
Reverse-Flash: You know who I am?
The Flash: You died!
Reverse-Flash: Good to know. And guess what, Flash. I know what time period you're from. So that means very soon... you will die.

The Flash: Time to send you back where you belong.
Eobard Thawne: We'll meet again soon, Flash.
The Flash: I know. And every time, I'll be ready for you.

Dr. Harrison Wells: Listen to me. Thawne knows about you. Right here, right now. This is where he learns about you, all of you. It's how he knows about S.T.A.R. Labs, how he knows about me; the Harrison Wells from this Earth. And there is nothing I can do about it. There's nothing you can do about it. This is his origin story, and it's going to happen no matter what you do. But right here, right now... you can send him back to his time. You can save your friend. You can save Cisco and then move on with your life.
Joe West: This could be a good thing. You can finally let go of him.
The Flash: I could throw him three centuries from now. He'll always be a part of me.


"The Flash: Flash vs. Arrow (#1.8)" (2014)
The Flash: I've got to run.
Iris West: I bet you say that to all the girls.
The Flash: What other girls?

The Flash: [the Arrow fires explosion arrows into the wall behind him] You missed!
Arrow: No.
[the arrows explode]

Iris West: Flash. Be great to call you by your real name.
The Flash: You mean like "Ralph?"
Iris West: Is your name Ralph?

Arrow: [fires a rope around the Flash] You need to calm down.
The Flash: And you need to hold on.
[drags the Arrow across the street as he runs off]


"The Flash: Invasion! (#3.8)" (2016)
Lyla Michaels: You saw a ship? What else did you see?
The Flash: Enough to give Ridley Scott nightmares.

The Flash: Hey, Supergirl! Let's finally see who's faster.

[first lines]
Green Arrow: Oh, wow! You really did it this time, Barry.
The Flash: Seriously?
Green Arrow: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, seriously! You to come to Star City, ask for my help, and then, inevitably, immediately, we end up the creek!

Iris West: Uh... Barry... So Oliver Queen is the Green Arrow?
The Flash: Yeah.
Iris West: Oh, my God. He just got so much hotter.
The Flash: Oh, my God.


"The Flash: The Flash Is Born (#1.6)" (2014)
Iris West: Tony, turn yourself in before things get worse. It's not too late.
Tony Woodward: Yeah, it is. Cops are already looking for me, so get ready to cover the showdown of a lifetime, 'cause I'm not going out without a fight.
The Flash: Good, 'cause you just found one.
Tony Woodward: You just won't stay dead. Come to save your little fan girl?
The Flash: This is between us. Let her go.
Tony Woodward: Oh, I could, but I'd rather make her watch while I break every bone in your body.

The Flash: You're not hearing me.
Iris West: My hearing is fine. It's just selective.

[Iris finishes updating her blog and the Flash appears]
Iris West: How did you...? I literally just hit SEND.
The Flash: Speed reading.

The Flash: To be continued. Gotta run.


"Justice League: Only a Dream (#2.5)" (2003)
The Flash: What were you working on?
J'onn J'onzz: Nothing. I was taking a nap.

The Flash: Say no more.
Batman: I wasn't intending to.

Hawkgirl: [Flash waves his hand in front of the still J'onn's glowing eyes] Stop that.
The Flash: It's OK. I don't think he's home right now.

The Flash: You can't leave now. You haven't seen the ending.


Superhero Fight Club (2015) (TV)
The Flash: Come on. Not even a hint?
Arrow: Nope. Look, you're part of the club now, so I thought you deserved a proper initiation.

Elevator Girl: I just have to say I think you two put the super in superhero.
Arrow: It's something we do to blow off steam.
The Flash: Wait, "we"?
Arrow: Just remember, this club only has one rule: there are no rules.

[Firestorm blasts everyone out of the ring]
Heat Wave: Awesome!
Firestorm: That's how it's done.
The Flash: [to Arrow] And I thought you had anger management issues.


"Justice League: The Ties That Bind (#4.2)" (2005)
Kalibak: Well, if it isn't my treacherous stepbrother... and his cow.
Big Barda: Arrogant worm! How dare you...
The Flash: [breaking up fight] Knock it off! What are you guys, twelve?
[sotto voce]
The Flash: I can't believe I'm the mature one here.

[as they're about to enter the X-pit]
Mr. Miracle: [to Flash and Barda] Neither of you signed on for this.
Big Barda: Actually, I did. The day I married you.
The Flash: Well, I'm not that commited, but I'm with you.

The Flash: Come on, Ugly! Move that hairy butt!
Kalibak: It's... humiliating being rescued by your enemy.
Mr. Miracle: As humiliating as being Virman Vundabar's pet?
Kalibak: Well, if it isn't my treacherous stepbrother.
[Looks over at Big Barda]
Kalibak: And his cow.
Big Barda: Arrogant worm. How dare you...
[Big Barda goes to strike Kalibak]
The Flash: Knock it off! What are you guys, twelve? I can't believe I'm the mature one here.
Mr. Miracle: He's right. We've got bigger problems.
Virman Vundabar: [a video monitor turns on revealing Virman Vundabar] Indeed you do, fools! Much bigger! And, oh, how I will delight in watching you fail!
[Barda blasts the monitor]
Virman Vundabar: Ver-r-r-ry interesting... but futile.


"The Flash: Trial of the Trickster (#1.21)" (1991)
The Flash: [catches bullets fired at The Trickster] It's not guns that kill people. It's these little hard things.
[throws a bullet back at Officer Bellows]

The Flash: Hey... I could vibrate my fingers through somebody's brain!
James Jesse: Oh ho ho! Gross! Well, maybe later.

James Jesse: Are you prepared to carry out sentence, Mr. Executioner?
The Flash: [brandishing array of death weapons] Uh... no. I, uh, can't decide which to use!
James Jesse: [guffawing] Well. That's why they call me the hanging judge.


"Justice League: Comfort and Joy (#2.23)" (2003)
[Ultra-Humanite places the toy in front of the children; it lights up, and starts playing the theme from "The Nutcracker."]
D.J. Rubber Ducky: [Humanite's voice] Hello, children. Come close and I'll tell you a story.
Little Girl: Is that D.J. Rubber Ducky?
Little Boy: He sounds weird.
D.J. Rubber Ducky: [as they gather round] Little Clara had just received a beautiful toy nutcracker from her godfather, the mysterious Herr Drosselmeyer...
Ultra-Humanite: Well? An improvement, wouldn't you say?
The Flash: I kind of liked it when he made the poopy noise.
[Humanite frowns; Flash looks at the children, listening raptly to the story]
D.J. Rubber Ducky: That night, as Clara slept beneath the Christmas tree, her beloved toy came alive to lead her on an unforgettable adventure...
The Flash: But this is good too.

Ultra-Humanite: [of the top hat] I won't wear it.
The Flash: Oh, come on, I'm wearing the beard. You don't want to scare the kids, do you?
Ultra-Humanite: The indignity...

Ultra-Humanite: You'll be happy to know, Flash, that your words - jejeune though they were - did not fall on deaf ears. I appreciate the sentiment behind them and therefore call a truce in honor of the season.
The Flash: Seriously?
Ultra-Humanite: You'll have the toy to give to your young friends. I'm improving it, too.
The Flash: [suspicious] It's not gonna blow up or anything?
Ultra-Humanite: [puh-leeze] Flash. It IS Christmas.


"Justice League: Destroyer (#5.13)" (2006)
Green Lantern: [looking at the giant drill] We gotta find a way to take this out for good!
The Flash: Why don't you just throw it into the sun?
[GL looks at him skeptically]
The Flash: Yeah, I guess that was a pretty stupid idea.
Green Lantern: No, maybe you're on to something. But I'll need more leverage... and a trench.
The Flash: On it!
[Flash digs a trench in a few seconds]
The Flash: Now what?
[GL creates a giant catapult]
The Flash: Aw, cool!
Green Lantern: [catapults the giant drill into the air] Doesn't look like it quite made escape-velocity.
The Flash: Nope!
[watching it land on an enemy ship]
The Flash: Good effort, though.

Sroya Bashir: [Reporting] This has been the scene all over the world. In the wake of Darkseid's defeat, his attacking forces have withdrawn, persumably back to wherever it is they came from.
Superman: Thanks to Luthor, of all people.
J'onn J'onzz: In many ways, Lex Luthor represents the worst mankind has to offer.
Superman: But he died saving us all.
Batman: I doubt either of them died.
Superman: We saw it this time.
The Flash: You saw it last time too.
Green Lantern: What's the old saying? Believe half of what you see...
Shayera Hol: ...And none of what you hear. They'll be back.
J'onn J'onzz: And we'll be ready for them.

The Flash: These are the end times.


Justice League: War (2014) (V)
Green Lantern: Flash, my boy. Great to see you. Oh, yeah, and that's Batman.
The Flash: Batman's real?
Green Lantern: Yeah, he's over there.
The Flash: Wait, what? It is a real honor to meet you, sir, Batman. Sir, Batman, sir. Ahem.
Green Lantern: Don't bother. That guy's a total tool.
Batman: I followed your efforts in Central City, Flash. You do tight, efficient work.
Green Lantern: Hey, Barry, you, uh, got a little something on your nose.

Cyborg: I think what Lantern is saying is that it's time for some teamwork. So let's pull it together.
Shazam: Yeah, baby, clap it up.
The Flash: What's the plan, then?
Green Lantern: Well, he blast those beams out of his eyes, right?
Wonder Woman: It's settled, then. We blind him.
Green Lantern: That's as good as a plan as any. Yeah, we follow and we stay out of sight. I'll turn on the fireworks to get his attention. Princess, you in striking distance and stab that son of a bitch in the eyes.
Wonder Woman: Like poor damned Oedipus.
Shazam: Yeah, what the hot Greek chick said.
The Flash: And the invasion of monsters raining from the sky, what about them?
Cyborg: I might be able to send them back where they came from.
Green Lantern: Good enough for me. Here we go, team. We got this.

Shazam: I don't know, a team? I've got a lot of responsibilities.
Wonder Woman: As do I.
Green Lantern: Well, I have a whole universe to protect, people, so there you go.
The Flash: Come on, we can do it together.
Green Lantern: Yeah? Can you fly in space?
Superman: I can.
Green Lantern: Not my point. Look, we're not friends. We're not a team.
The Flash: I don't agree, Hal. I kind of like of being a part of something.
Green Lantern: Yeah, you would. Listen, this was just a one-time deal, okay?
Batman: And what if something should happen again?
Green Lantern: Please, what could possible happen?


"The Flash: Legends of Today (#2.8)" (2015)
Green Arrow: We need to expose his wings.
The Flash: I'm open to suggestions.
Green Arrow: What, now you're listening to me?
The Flash: It's your city, Oliver.

Vandal Savage: You tried those arrows once before, remember? They didn't quite finish the job, now, did they?
Green Arrow: I'm not gonna make that mistake again.
The Flash: You're gonna leave Kendra alone.
Vandal Savage: I can't do that. While my destiny is to live forever, Chay-Ara's is to die, as is yours now.

[as they duck behind a church pew as Vandal Savage fires the Staff of Horus]
Green Arrow: Any ideas?
The Flash: Oh, now you'll listen to me?
Green Arrow: It's your city.


"Justice League: Panic in the Sky (#4.11)" (2005)
Batman: You want me to *what*?
Wonder Woman: Turn yourself over to US authority, along with the rest of us.
Flash: Okay, that makes sense.
Superman: Meet us at the coordinates I'm sending you. We should all go over together.
Batman: This is the single dumbest plan I've ever heard! If you're feeling guilty, clear your own name! Don't stand on the sidelines waiting for someone else to do it!
Wonder Woman: We've already voted. Five in favor.
Flash: Six.
Wonder Woman: You have to come with us, Bruce.
Batman: I don't 'have' to do anything! I'm a part-timer, remember!
[Batman ends transmission]
Wonder Woman: ...Actually, he took it a lot better than I'd expected.

[Six of the original seven JLAers are surrendering to authorities]
Soldier: Where's Batman?
Flash: Running late. The Batmobile, it lost a wheel. The Joker got away.
[pause]
Flash: That's what I heard.

Lex Luthor: Did you really think you could take me down all by yourself?
Amanda Waller: Actually, yeah. But on the off chance I might have been wrong...
[Luthor turns and sees the Leaguers standing there]
Flash: Ta-da.
Superman: It's over, Lex.
Amanda Waller: Not until I...
[Luthor suddenly screams in pain, as pistons extend from his back and his hands turn into tentacles]
Lex Luthor: I had hoped to remain hidden until I could install myself into the android...
[a familiar face appears within Luthor's stomach]
Brainiac: ...But you forced my hand.
Superman: Brainiac!


"Justice League: Flashpoint (#4.10)" (2005)
Father: [to his crying daughter] We can't go back, honey. It's not safe.
Little Girl: But he'll be scared all by himself.
Father: There's plenty of food until they let us back into the house.
Flash: [walking up to father and girl] You guys came out of the blue duplex?
Father: Yeah, my daughter's worred about...
[Flash runs off, then immediately returns with an orange cat]
Father: ...her cat.
Little Girl: Beebop!

The Flash: Granny Flash always said that problem with "an eye for an eye" is that in the end, everyone ends up blind.

Superman: [entering the Watchtower control room with Supergirl] Give me one good reason not to go down there and take them out.
J'onn J'onzz: If you didn't know the answer, you wouldn't have bothered to ask.
Superman: Don't handle me, J'onn! I'm serious!
J'onn J'onzz: We don't have hard evidence that they've committed any crimes.
Superman: Oh, come on! You know they're dirty!
Oliver Queen: Then maybe we should put more effort into proving it and less into acting like a bunch of hyperthyroid stormtroopers.
Superman: I don't remember asking you for your opinion!
Oliver Queen: No? How about when you guys hijacked me up here against my will and made me join this team? Batman said I was supposed to keep you guys honest.
Superman: [menacingly] Do I look like Batman to you?
The Flash: Actually, you kinda do. Especially when you're all scowly like that.
Superman: We can't let Cadmus get away with it.
J'onn J'onzz: No one's saying we should, but we have to keep a cool head.
Supergirl: Do you know what they did to me?
Oliver Queen: Look, kid, Hamilton's a piece of garbage. Luthor's worse. But this isn't the way to stop them.
J'onn J'onzz: We must also consider the possibility that Cadmus is right to be afraid of us...
Supergirl: [outraged] What!
J'onn J'onzz: ...*and* there's strong evidence of Cadmus having connections to the government.
Superman: Maybe, to some rogue black ops group. The real government wouldn't get involved in anything like this.
Oliver Queen: Hey, I'm the only guy in the room who doesn't have superpowers, and let me tell you, you guys scare me. What if you do decide to go down there, taking care of whoever you think is guilty? Who could stop you? Me?
Supergirl: So you *want* the government to have a bunch of superhuman weapons just to keep us in check?
Oliver Queen: No - I don't know - Yeah!
[regains composure]
Oliver Queen: Look, I'm an old lefty. The government must do for people what people can't do for themselves. The people sure can't protect themselves from the likes of us.
Superman: We're not talking about the government, we're talking about a shadow cabinet that's taken it upon themselves to eliminate us! They came after us, we have to hit them back hard!
The Flash: Grammy Flash used to say that the trouble with "an eye for an eye" is that everyone ends up blind.


"Justice League: Wild Cards: Part II (#2.22)" (2003)
The Flash: That about wraps you up.
[King mumbles under the Mummy wrapping]
The Flash: I know. It's all I could think of on the spur of the moment.

The Joker: Even you can't disarm one my bombs in time.
The Flash: Shut up!
The Joker: What kind of retort is that? You're not even trying.
[Flash reaches for the blue wire]
The Joker: Not the blue one! You'll blow us all to smithereens!

The Flash: Hey, Supes! That's the last of bombs. We win.
Superman: That was quite a stunt you just pulled off.
The Flash: I know. Can't wait to catch the rerun.


"Justice League: In Blackest Night (#1.4)" (2001)
The Flash: I thought you were busy with an earthquake?
Superman: It was just a 4.0.

Superman: Flash, take the controls.
[everyone but Flash leaves the ship]
The Flash: "Flash, take the controls!" Does anyone *ask* if I know how?

The Flash: Why do I feel like a hockey-puck?


"Vixen: Episode #2.1" (2016)
The Flash: Unwinding a tornado was the very first trick I learned.

The Flash: Oh, your timing is beyond awesome. I'll help Jax and Professor Stein, you deal with Weather Wizard.
Vixen: Why do you let Cisco name the bad guys?
The Flash: I ask myself that question a lot.


"Justice League: A Knight of Shadows: Part II (#1.21)" (2002)
The Flash: [J'onn is taking the stone to La Fey] We'll stop him. I promise.
Etrigan: Like you promised to protect the stone?
Bruce Wayne: We'll do whatever it takes, Etrigan.
Etrigan: Are you saying you're prepared to take out one of your own?
Bruce Wayne: I repeat. *Whatever* it takes!

[the League teleports into Mordred's throne room]
The Flash: Ding! Fifth floor - hardware, sporting goods, evil sorceresses!


"Justice League: A Knight of Shadows (#1.20)" (2002)
The Flash: Harv Hickman? The magazine publisher?
Wonder Woman: You know his work?
The Flash: I... only read it for the articles.

Wonder Woman: You've been hunting this sorceress Le Fay for how long?
Etrigan: For hundreds of years, she's taunted me in a never-ending game of cat-and-mouse. But I'll never rest until her soul writhes in the Eternal Pit!
The Flash: [aside] And I thought Bats was creepy.


"The Flash: Enter Zoom (#2.6)" (2015)
The Flash: Did you guys see that?
Cisco Ramon: See him catch a bolt of lightning with his demonic claws? Yeah, saw that.

The Flash: What do you want from me?
Zoom: Everything.
The Flash: You want to be me? Is that it? You want to be a hero?
Zoom: Heroes die.
The Flash: Only if you can catch them.


"Superman: Speed Demons (#2.4)" (1997)
The Flash: Man of Steel, feet of lead!

The Flash: Hey! Wait for me!


"Justice League: Starcrossed: Part II (#2.25)" (2004)
[the League is forced to travel in street clothes to avoid detection by the Thangarians]
The Flash: Hold on a second here. What about the whole secret identity thing? I mean, I trust you guys, but I'm not sure I'm ready to...
Batman: [points to Flash] Wally West.
[points to Superman]
Batman: Clark Kent.
[removes his mask]
Batman: Bruce Wayne.
The Flash: Show-off.

The Flash: I think we wanted the *non*-hawkpeople line.


"Vixen: Episode #1.6" (2015)
Mari McCabe: Hey, I thought I was supposed to have a cool name or something.
The Flash: You think the "Arrow" is cool?
Arrow: Keep talking, Flash.

The Flash: [to Mari] If it helps, Cisco's been calling you Vixen. Not that Cisco is a name of any one affiliated with me. He's not. I mean, if there was a Cisco affiliated with me. Which there isn't.
Arrow: Were you and Felicity separated at birth?
The Flash: I hope not. Because if we had been, that kiss would be weird.
Arrow: You kissed her?
The Flash: You know what? I gotta run.


"Justice League: Injustice for All (#1.18)" (2002)
Hawkgirl: That's fast.
The Flash: Yeah, fastest man alive.
Hawkgirl: Which might explain why you can't get a date.

The Flash: [to Copperhead] Down, boy.


"The Flash: Shade (#3.6)" (2016)
Caitlin Snow: Barry, we're in the van. Can you hear us?
The Flash: And I just got tossed on my ass like a rag doll.

The Flash: It's over, Alchemy.
Doctor Alchemy: Over? You have no idea what's about to begin.


"Young Justice: Independence Day: Part 2 (#1.2)" (2010)
The Flash: You should have called us.
Batman: End results aside, we're not happy. You hacked Justice League systems, disobeyed direct orders, and endangered lives. You will not be doing this again.
Aqualad: I am sorry, but we will.
Aquaman: Aqualad, stand down.
Aqualad: Apologies, my king, but no. We did good work here tonight, the work you trained us to do. Together on our own we forged something powerful, important.
The Flash: If this is about your treatment at the Hall, the three of you...
Kid Flash: The four of us, and it's not.
Robin: Batman, we're ready to do what you taught us, or why teach us at all?
Superboy: Why let them tell us what to do? It's simple. Get on board or get out of the way.

The Flash: The League will still handle the obvious stuff. There's a reason we have these big targets on our chest.
Aquaman: But CADMUS proves the bad guys are getting smarter. Batman needs a team that can operate on the sly.
Batman: The five of you will be that team.
Robin: Cool! Wait. Five?
Batman: [Ms Martian enters] This is the Martian Manhunter's niece. Ms. Martian.


"The Flash: Invincible (#2.22)" (2016)
The Flash: I admire what you're trying to do, but the best way to help is to just leave it to the police.
Wally West: Like you did.
The Flash: I do have powers, Wally. It is a little different. This isn't your fight. It's mine.
Wally West: No, it's all of ours. This is my city too now. It's up to all of us to protect it.

The Flash: The meta we spoke to said Zoom created a breach and escaped.
Joe West: And how did he do that again?
The Flash: Who knows, but he's back on Earth-2 now.
Captain David Singh: Earth-2? That something else I don't want to know about?
The Flash, Joe West: No.


Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe (2008) (VG)
Deathstroke: [Seeing The Flash running around him] Metropolis isn't your turf. You better go back to Keystone City before something bad happens.
The Flash: [Knocks down Deathstroke] Don't bother getting up, Deathstroke, you're going to jail.
Deathstroke: [Gets up] Not without a fight.

Catwoman: [after being defeated by The Flash] This is why I don't play nice with you hero types.
Kano: [Coming in and picking up a valuable item that Catwoman dropped] Ooh. This is a bit of tardy some.
The Flash: Alright, what's your deal?
[Then is effected by the Kombat rage]
Kano: You don't look so good, matey.
Catwoman: I'll take that.
[Takes the item from Kano]
Kano: Hey.
[Catwoman then disappears in a portal]
The Flash: Alright, hand over the gem.
Kano: Can't, matey. She took it.
The Flash: And you helped her escape?
Kano: I don't like your attitude, you need to be taught some manners.
[Then Kano shoots lasers from his eyes but The Flash dodges out of the way]
Kano: You give Kabal a run for his money.
The Flash: My turn.
[He fights Kano and defeats him, then has Kano by the neck and is about to kill him and Batman appears]
Batman: Who is that man, and what are you doing here in Gotham?
The Flash: Batman. This freak, this freak tried to kill me. Now, I'm gonna return the favor.
Batman: No, you're not. It's clear that something's wrong with you. The Flash I know doesn't kill.
The Flash: He does now.
[Fights Batman and defeats him]
The Flash: I thought you were a master of hand-to-hand combat.
Batman: [Tazes The Flash] I am.


"Young Justice: Agendas (#1.22)" (2012)
[the Justice League is gathered to discuss possible new members]
The Flash: Still, we could always use more raw power. And Earth has a third Green Lantern - Guy Gardner.
Hal Jordan, John Stewart: No!
The Flash: But we could really...
Hal Jordan, John Stewart: No!

The Flash: Maybe it's time we all talk about the elephant in the room. Should Captain Marvel stay a member? Now that we know he's really only ten years old?
Red Tornado: He does possess an adult body and the wisdom of Solomon.
Aquaman: Wisdom does not equal maturity.
Captain Marvel: Hey, I'm sitting right here!
Black Canary: Then, Billy, maybe you should leave. Until we hash this out.
Batman: No. Captain Marvel is a member and is entitled to participate, until or unless he's voted out.


"The Flash: King Shark (#2.15)" (2016)
King Shark: Flash, Zoom wants you dead!
The Flash: Yeah, I know. Then you get to go home, right? Well, guess what, man? The breaches that Zoom used to bring you here, they're all gone. I closed 'em, for good! There's no more Zoom. There's no way back to your Earth. You're gonna be locked up here for a very long time.

King Shark: Those guns won't stop me, Flash. First I'll kill you, then I'll kill them.
The Flash: Oh, yeah? Let's do this then! Come on!


"The Flash: Plastique (#1.5)" (2014)
Caitlin Snow: Barry, this isn't a roadrunner cartoon.
The Flash: How fast would I need to go to run up the side of a building?
Caitlin Snow: How far up do you need to go?
The Flash: Uh, I-I don't know. Fifty meters, give or take. Guys, hurry!
Caitlin Snow: Just run really fast and you'll be fine, but you need to maintain your velocity on your way down, or...
The Flash: Or-or what?
Caitlin Snow: Splat.

The Flash: [to Iris] Meet me on the roof. I'll give you a head start.


"Justice League: Secret Society: Part II (#2.18)" (2003)
The Flash: [trying to high-five Superman] Whoo, back in business!
[no response]
The Flash: Are-aren't we?
Wonder Woman: A lot of things were said.
The Flash: Yeah, but that was all brain control. We didn't mean...
J'onn J'onzz: We meant every word.
Hawkgirl: ...So what do we do?
Green Lantern: All we can do is say we're sorry and move on.

[Flash dangles a thug upside down off a building]
Thug: Who do you think you are, Batman?
The Flash: It's been a long night, just tell me where Shade is, okay?
Thug: Look, buddy, I know Batman. I once ratted out a counterfeiter to Batman. And believe me, you are no Bat...
[Flash drops him]
Thug: MAAAAAAAAAAAAN...!


"Justice League: Wild Cards (#2.21)" (2003)
[the Flash has to defuse a bomb]
The Flash: [over radio] Batman, I've got a problem.
[cut to Batman, being strangled by one of Jack's arms]
Batman: You... don't... say!

[while Batman is evading Jack's punches, he talks to Flash over the radio]
The Flash: I found a bomb, you gotta talk me through disarming it.
Batman: Okay. Remove the lid.
The Flash: Already done.
Batman: Don't jump ahead! Do exactly as I say!
The Flash: I opened it before I called...
Batman: [blow lands] Uh!
The Flash: Batman? You okay?
Batman: Grasp the red metal collar with both hands, pull it straight up. It's magnetized, don't touch the sides or it'll blow up the whole block.
The Flash: Done.
Batman: Disconnect the following wires in...
[blow lands]
Batman: AH! - in precisely this order: blue, yellow-and-black-striped, red, then black.
The Flash: [hands blur over the wires, then] Okay, what next?
Batman: You're done, find another one!
The Flash: I'm on it!


"Justice League: Paradise Lost (#1.8)" (2002)
The Flash: Picture it. The sun, the sea, hundreds of women just like her running around, and me, the first man they've seen in... oh, maybe forever? Oh, and look what I brought. Iced Mochas for everyone. Sweet.
J'onn J'onzz: I fail to see the attraction.
The Flash: Man, you really are from Mars.

The Flash: [the Flash manages to distract a giant fire-breathing snake for a while, then runs to J'onn J'onzz] You okay?
J'onn J'onzz: You get the relic, I'll handle the rest.
[the Flash dashes off to get the relic as the snake lunges at J'onn, who hits it hard with a punch to the jaw, it collapses onto the ground out cold]
The Flash: [Runs beside J'onn with the relic] Remind me to never get on *your* bad side.


"Justice League: Tabula Rasa (#2.3)" (2003)
Hawkgirl: It was some kind of android. It had wings built into it, and a mace too. Scary, huh?
Wonder Woman: Sounds like whoever made it had you in mind.
Hawkgirl: Yeah, it even acted like me.
The Flash: Now that's scary.
Wonder Woman: The android... about 10 feet tall, gray skin?
Hawkgirl: How'd you know?
[Wonder Woman points to TV coverage of Amazo fighting police]

Hawkgirl: It even acted like me.
The Flash: Now *that's* scary.


"The Flash: Power Outage (#1.7)" (2014)
Iris West: Oh, now you show up.
The Flash: I'm sorry I wasn't there for you today. It couldn't be helped.
Iris West: It's okay. A girl's gotta be her own hero every now and again.
The Flash: I promise I'll never be late again.
Iris West: My best friend is always saying that, and he is always late.
The Flash: You're worth being on time for.


"The Flash: Paradox (#3.2)" (2016)
The Rival: You found me again, Flash. I wondered how long it'd take you this time to figure it out.
The Flash: Wasn't too hard.
The Rival: I see you didn't bring your little sidekick with you, though.
The Rival: Nope. Just me.
The Rival: That's too bad. I brought one.
[Flash is zapped from behind by Doctor Alchemy]
The Rival: Oh, and Flash? A little, uh, quaking in your boots wouldn't be inappropriate.


"Challenge of the Superfriends: Revenge on Gorilla City/The Anti-Matter Monster (#1.9)" (1978)
The Flash: Great wings of Mercury!


"Young Justice: Bloodlines (#2.6)" (2012)
Bart Allen: Ah, c'mon. Grandpa. Let the League handle this guy. I mean how often does a relative from the future show up at your door.
The Flash: Listen, I-. I'll deal with you later. Stay put.
[Smiles]
The Flash: I'll be back in a flash.
[Zips off]
Bart Allen: Back in a flash. Wow. Does he say that often?
Iris West-Allen, Wally West, Jay Garrick, Joan Garrick: [All sigh] Too often.


"Justice League: The Savage Time: Part III (#1.26)" (2002)
[as the Blackhawks approach a German factory on a bombing run, Flash runs in to evacuate the workers]
The Flash: All right, people, quitting time!
[the workers stare at him, uncomprehending]
The Flash: You heard me, get out! Raus! Schnell! Chop-chop!


"The Flash: Flash of Two Worlds (#2.2)" (2015)
Patty Spivot: Flash?
The Flash, Jay Garrick: Coming.


"The Flash: Running to Stand Still (#2.9)" (2015)
The Flash: What is this?
Mark Mardon: That is a box with a bomb in it.
James Jesse: Yep. I've handed out about a hundred of 'em today, ha. Oh, it feels so good to give.
Mark Mardon: You see, right now, there are about a hundred random children who've each taken home a box, just like that one, and are shovin' it under their Christmas tree. There's no way for you to get all of 'em - even IF you know where to look.
The Flash: No, no. Please don't do this.
Mark Mardon: What, me? Kill a hundred families? No. That's up to you. I'm happy just to take your life. So, this is how it's gonna be: You are gonna stand there and let me end you, very publicly and very painfully, and I'll let everybody live; but, if I see even a little flicker of electricity on you, casket makers in this town are gonna have a VERY merry Christmas. So, Flash, what's it gonna be, huh?


"The Flash: Ghost in the Machine (#1.8)" (1990)
Desmond Powell: Slow down, Speedy. We got to have a plan. Hop in.
[opens the door to his car]
The Flash: No. Bad for the image.
[runs off]


"Justice League: Injustice for All: Part II (#1.19)" (2002)
The Flash: Lights out, Shade!


Injustice: Gods Among Us (2013) (VG)
The Flash: Stop what you're doing!
Deathstroke: It's not what I'm doing... It's what I've done.


"The Flash: Rogue Air (#1.22)" (2015)
The Flash: Thanks, fellas.
Firestorm: No problem.
The Flash: Nice haircut. And I see we've abandoned our traditional green.
Arrow: Trying something different. Look... I might need a favor from you.
The Flash: Wherever, whenever.
[as Arrow and Firestorm leave, Flash walks up to the unconscious Reverse-Flash]
The Flash: I got you.


"The Flash: Potential Energy (#2.10)" (2016)
The Flash: Hey, Turtle. So you want to know my new definition of irony? Now you... are our most prized possession.


"The Flash: Pilot (#1.0)" (1990)
Nicolas Pike: What are you? And where did you come from?
Flash: I came from you, Pike! You made me when you killed my brother.
Nicolas Pike: I killed a lot of men's brothers.


"Challenge of the Superfriends: Swamp of the Living Dead/World Beneath the Ice (#1.10)" (1978)
[last lines]
The Flash: There seems to be no way to predict what those with evil minds will do.
Superman: Except for one thing, which is easy to predict: their constant fight against justice and the SuperFriends.


"The Flash: Fast Forward (#1.14)" (1991)
The Flash: The future's starting to look a lot brighter.


"The Flash: The Sound and the Fury (#1.11)" (2015)
The Flash: It's over, Rathaway.
Hartley Rathaway: You know my name. I know some names too. Caitlyn Snow. Cisco Ramon. Harrison Wells. I can hear the radio waves emanating from your suit. About 1900 megahertz. Is that them on the other end, listening? Are they going to hear you die?
The Flash: No. They're gonna hear you get your ass kicked.


"Challenge of the Superfriends: Wanted: The Superfriends/Rokan: Enemy from Space (#1.1)" (1978)
The Flash: It started with an incredible dream I had last night.
Superman: No more strange, I'm sure, than the one I had. I dreamt I robbed Fort Knox.
Batman: That's interesting. I dreamt Robin and I looted the U.S. Mint
Robin: Holy coincidences, Batman! I had the same dream.
Hawkman: It seems we all had criminal dreams last night. But when we arrived at the Hall of Justice this morning, we discovered something that turned our dreams into nightmares.


Justice League Heroes (2006) (VG)
Batman: You ready to talk to us again?
Superman: Sure. If by talk, you mean kicking Darkseid's ass into low orbit.
Batman: Then I think we can do business.
Martian Manhunter: What's the plan?
Batman: We attack in waves. Minimize the chance of us all being defeated at once.
Flash: Once we're committed, we don't stop until it's over. One way or the other.
Superman: Only one way: Darkseid's going down.


"The Flash: Flashpoint (#3.1)" (2016)
The Rival: How'd you find this place, Flash?
Kid Flash: I'm so gonna kick your ass.
The Rival: Oh ho ho... There's two of you here now? Okay. Is that supposed to scare me?
Kid Flash: A little quaking in your boots wouldn't be inappropriate.
The Rival: Well, here's how scared I am of you.
[removes his cowl]
Edward Clariss: My name is Edmard Clariss. Rivals should know each other's names. I mean, you might as well tell me, since neither of you are leaving this place alive.
[to Barry]
Edward Clariss: Who are you?
The Flash: Me? I'm the Flash. That's all you need to know.
Edward Clariss: Well, after I rip that cowl off off your corpse, I'll know how you are. Just another pretender who thought they could take me on.
[puts his cowl back on]
The Rival: So who wants to meet the Speed Force first?


Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
The Flash: Bruce! Listen to me now! It's Lois! Lois Lane! She's the key! Am I too soon? I'm too soon! You were right about him! You've always been right about him! Fear him! Find us, Bruce! You have to find us!


"Young Justice: Independence Day (#1.1)" (2010)
The Flash: Stealing ice? Really? Isn't that a big cliché for even Captain Cold?


"The Flash: Family of Rogues (#2.3)" (2015)
The Flash: Lisa was safe. Why did you do that?
Leonard Snart: He broke my sister's heart. Only fair I break his.


"The Big Bang Theory: The Dependence Transcendence (#10.3)" (2016)
Sheldon Cooper: Superheroes take performance-enhancing chemicals?
The Flash: You bet.
The Flash: You know why Hulk is so strong?
The Flash: Steroids.
The Flash: You know why Batman wanders around at night getting into fights?
The Flash: Scotch.


"The Flash: The Trickster (#1.11)" (1991)
The Flash: [Trickster has taken hostages] Let 'em go, Jesse. It's over.
The Trickster: [to Megan] Do I have to kill him to prove my love?
[the Flash pushes a hostage out of harm's way]
The Trickster: I hate it when he does that.


"The Flash: Killer Frost (#3.7)" (2016)
The Flash: Please. Let me help you.
Caitlin Snow: Like you helped your mother? Or Wally? Or me? You keep messing with everyone's lives, wrecking everything, and we're left behind to pick up the pieces from your mistakes. Some things you break can't be put back together.
The Flash: I can fix this.
Caitlin Snow: Oh, like you fixed Cisco's family? You didn't tell Cisco that you screwed him worst of all, did you? You hear that, Cisco? Dante was alive, healthy and happy, until Barry created Flashpoint. When he reset things, that's what killed him. Barry is the reason your brother is dead.


"Justice League: Maid of Honor: Part II (#2.8)" (2003)
Green Lantern: If I were them, I'd want you to save the world, not waste time coming back for me.
The Flash: Yeah, but we'd come anyway.


"The Flash: Watching the Detectives (#1.2)" (1990)
The Flash: Well what would you do? Run through the streets stark naked at 350 miles per hour with bells on your toes?


"Challenge of the Superfriends: Invasion of the Fearians/The Demons of Exxor (#1.2)" (1978)
The Flash: Great wings of Mercury!


"Legends of the Superheroes: The Roast (#1.2)" (1979)
Aunt Minerva: You're the Flash, right?
Flash: That's right... the World's Fastest Man.
Aunt Minerva: Pass.


JLA Adventures: Trapped in Time (2014) (V)
The Flash: These are all hold-the-pickle, right?


"The Flash: Child's Play (#1.6)" (1990)
[while holding a guitar]
Flash: Hey, Lesko! YOU READY TO ROCK?


Suicide Squad (2016)
[to Captain Boomerang, who has killed his own henchman]
The Flash: No honor among thieves, eh?


"Legends of Tomorrow: Invasion! (#2.7)" (2016)
Felicity Smoak: Good work planting all of Professor Stein's nano-weapons, but we still got Dominators all over the country. This looks like a job for Supergirl.
The Flash: Thanks, Felicity. I'm not the least bit insulted.
Felicity Smoak: Ah, sorry. I mean Supergirl and Flash. This is totally a job for the both of you. That's what I meant. Supergirl and... Flash.


"The Flash: Rogue Time (#1.16)" (2015)
The Flash: How many times are we gonna go through this, Snart?
Leonard Snart: Until the best man wins!
[Flash grabs Lisa and takes her golden gun]
The Flash: Drop the gun!
Leonard Snart: We both know you're not going to do anything to her. Oh, by the way, meet my baby sister. Lisa, Flash. Flash, Lisa.